The Narcissistic Parent.

It is a very confusing environment upon which to formulate healthy self-worth, self-esteem and self-belief.

As a result children usually develop in one of three ways in an environment with a narcissistic parent:

1 - A healthy level of self-worth, self-esteem and self-belief. To achieve this they would need to be positively influenced by an adult displaying these virtues, perhaps outside the immediate home environment. A child with healthy self-esteem is less likely to hold themselves back in life. 

2 - A low self-worth, low self-esteem and a lack of self-belief. This will affect the child’s thinking and actions through to adulthood and they are more likely to hold themselves back in life.

3 - High in narcissistic traits. In cases where the child models the narcissistic parent they are likely to copy that parent and ‘gang-up’ on the other parent/partner and any siblings with low self-esteem and while it might be unkind, it will be framed as ‘just a bit of fun.’ Children with narcissistic traits will be less likely to hold themselves back in life, yet will be more likely to manipulate or take advantage of others, for their own gain.

To develop their own self-esteem and not carry the trauma that a narcissistic parent inflicts, it's important for children of narcissistic parents to learn how to set boundaries, practice self-care, and seek support. Setting boundaries with a narcissistic parent can help children learn to assert themselves and respect their own needs and feelings. 

However, acknowledging that one is in this situation is very difficult, even for a grown adult, yet when an adult does discover they have low self-esteem it’s important to identify where it came from and know that it isn’t their fault.

Equally difficult can be realising that while their low self-esteem wasn’t their fault, changing their beliefs and situations is their responsibility.

Learning to practice self-care can help us focus on our own well-being and build resilience against a parent's negative influence. Seeking support can help us process our feelings and develop coping strategies.

It's also important for children brought up by narcissistic parents to work on understanding that they are not responsible for their parent's behaviour. This can help them to develop a sense of empathy towards themselves and let go of the guilt and shame that they may feel.

It's also important for children brought up by narcissistic parents to develop a strong sense of identity and to understand that the opinions of others, especially the narcissistic parent, don't need to define them and their lives.